Realizing Love and Affection
While I tell a great number of stories about my family and my personal life, I'm also very careful to share with others what I know would be OK. Most of the time the stories are about my life and my perspective of it, ensuring I don't divulge information that isn’t mine to share.
With that said. Our family has been dealing with a bit of a health challenge recently. We are certainly not unique as many families deal with health-related issues. But for our family, we've been blessed with so much in this world, including almost all of my loved ones being healthy most of my life.
Having someone you love being challenged with a major health-related issue causes immense emotional upheaval. There are certainly the questions of “why us”, “why now”, and “what can we do?” There's also the overwhelming nature of feeling hopeless, particularly if you are someone who has spent his life as a “fixer” but yet you can't fix.
Early on in my career, as a part of my job, I attended a great number of funerals. Alums and family members who were affiliated with the nonprofit that I worked for were the primary reason I attended religious celebrations of people's lives. The thing I took away, after contemplation for several years, was a deep sense of sadness because I heard too many people say “I wish I had told him or her” or “I wish they knew.” Each sentiment, with different words, was based on a sense of regret.
I took from those earlier experiences an unusual task. If I could write the eulogy of everyone that I loved while they were alive, realizing what I would say about them after they were gone but tell them the same while there were still with us on this earth, I would have much fewer regrets. And so I did that. It's an unusual mental exercise that causes a tear or two, but truly opens the heart to those you care for in uplifting way.
What we will deal with going forward is not going to be easy, but I feel pretty good that those that I love know why and how much they have influenced my wonderful life.